Friday, April 04, 2008

Sudden Realization

Have you ever realized you were naked?

And by "realized you were naked" I mean - it came as a bit of a shock?

Knowing you're naked is one thing, realizing it is something else altogether. Normally, when you realize you're naked - its because someone else pointed it out; generally because they weren't expecting it either, so they're like - whoa! There's a naked guy!

As I understand it - generally, if TWO or more people are naked (and near enough one another to converse) there's sort of a general understanding that "hey - we're all naked here and nobody's surprised." The understanding being: there is a reason for this nakedness - an implied covenant of nudity, if you will.

I'm talking about situations like locker rooms, Matt Dunn's house (any day), or Weekly Naked TV Day at the DudeRanch. Naked? Ok. Sure. No big deal and while you're up - get everybody a beer.

Nobody in the locker room points out "hey buddy, you aint got a stitch on." Why? Because they saw it coming.

BUT, when you REALIZE you're naked - you've got problems....and buddy, it happend to me.

In the not-so-distant past I was wakeboarding on the lake (first mistake). My second was not cinching up the 'ol board shorts tight enough.

The first wipe-out took my breath away and my shorts right along with it; and I quickly realized: Hey, wait. I'm naked....

At noon.

On the 4th of July.

In the middle of a crowded lake.

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