Wednesday, August 16, 2006

You're Standing Too Close To My SCORCHED EARTH

I just found out there is a corporate finance vehicle referred to as a "SCORCHED EARTH POLICY." I heard that term and immediately thought, "I dont know what this is, but it sounds AWESOME and I want to be a part of it."

Turns out - thats where the stockholders of a company have a deal in place to financially blast the company away in the event of a hostile takeover. Its really a preventative measure rather than an all-out attack on the aquisitive company, but it still sounds neat.

Who knew there was anything that insanely cool lurking in the dusty confines of your corporate finance textbook? All I remember from that class was something about a "beta" and asymptotic graphs of risk. I also remember how my professor was such a genius that he took his college loans and, instead of paying off his debt to the school, leveraged himself into mineral-rights trading. So, what I came out of that class with was a general sense of dissatisfaction over my inability to make money off mineral rights.

By the time he got out of college he was a millionaire and had property all over the place. When I got out of college I had a 1993 Ford Explorer with all the carpet torn out of the back and no other property of any kind....BUT I now know about SCORCHED EARTH policies, and apparently he doesn't. Clearly I WIN.

I'm going home now, and I'm taking my SCORCHED EARTH POLICY with me.


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